Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Bummer

Marathon training was going fabulous. I felt like I was running faster than ever and even had thoughts of future Boston Qualification ...

Then I got "runner's knee," also known as chondromalcia. Not. Fun. I feel like someone shot me in the knee cap every time I try to make my knee function like a knee. In other words, sitting, walking, stairs, running, etc. are not on my list of things I do well right now.

I had to drop out at mile 15.5 of 18.6 on Saturday. It took everything in me to make myself stop. Not only did I have the knee pain, but my body ached, and I was very nausious. People say, "Oh no... just too long of a run?" or "Oh no... maybe it was the heat?" No. I've run longer than that before. No. All my long runs had been a breeze and this was not much longer. No. The heat was fine, I was hydrated. No. My body just could. not. do. it. And it killed me to admit that.

So 3 days later I still have not run. My knee is feeling maybe 25% better and the competitor in me is going to try a run tonight. If anyone I knew were in this position, I would roll my eyes and call them crazy if they were going to try to run already. But when its you in this position, its the worst thing not to run. I get so mad when I see others running. I get so mad when I see my running clothes clean in the bin. I get so mad when it hurt to sit, walk, or go up stairs. I just get so mad that my body doesn't want to cooperate.

I have resigned to the fact that after this marathon, I'm going to stick to 1/2 marathons and lower. I want to work on speed. I want to finish fast. I enjoy that distance.

But I have not resigned to the idea that I won't be able to run the marathon. I'll find a way.

If there's a will, there's a way.

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